Jack Black #1

Lack of any form of an attention span (wow, look at my nifty cell phone cover). Addiction to expensive, fancy, looking six packs that I've never tried, but purchased because they looked sweet ass. Bad grammar, bad puncuation, bad articulation, horrible fashion sense an even horribler sense of what is and what is not a word. Nose picking, arse scratching, did i say scratching? Perhaps digging is a more appropriate word, nail biting and firing,leaving facial and other forms of body hair ALL OVER THE BATHROOM, shampoo borrowing, loufa using, toothbrush using, unusually stubborn. I'm a washing machine and dryer clothes-leaver-inner, a staying up all night playing on your computer doer and I have a horrible, tenacious, body odor problem.
Let me explain this odor problem, you see, I recently labeled my body odor existence as a problem when i realized that even though i knew I smelled I had no idea which orofous it was coming from. It was just like this mysterious stench that followed me around wherever i go, it's sort of like a small person penis, you know it's there you just can't find it. Get it? ... because it's so...small. No? Did I mention a rather off sense of humor?
Wow!!! that joke alone should give you all a pretty good idea of what one would have to put up with if they were so fortunate to live with me. Cotton Underwear. Sheesh.